#234 The Ancient Egyptians For Dummies (2007)

Author: Charlotte Booth
Title: The Ancient Egyptians For Dummies
Genre: History
Year: 2007
Pages: 370
Origin: read on the good old Kindle
Nod Rating: 2 nods out of 5

 

What is this? Another For Dummies book consumed by the Worm? Are standards slipping? What is the reason for this? And can the Worm continue to ask questions rather than complete a review?

Yes, dear readers, a second For Dummies book in the current book-reading season. In fact – brace yourselves – this is the second of three For Dummies reads. Three! The Worm went a little crazy during the month of August and binged on The Tudors For Dummies (review posted during November), The Ancient Greeks For Dummies (to be posted soon), and this book, The Ancient Egyptians For Dummies. It appears these easy-reading textbooks are an addiction in which the Worm needs to wean himself off. Or does he? (Apologies, yet another question).

Written by Egyptologist Charlotte Booth, The Ancient Egyptians For Dummies was the Worm’s first foray into this period of history. A brief and gentle read will bring to life – in a basic way – the society of ancient Egypt. Thankfully, Booth cuts out the dense terminology that has put off the Worm from accessing this period of history previously. Instead, a portrait of this age (or indeed, ages) is built up: of various pharaohs, military victories, epic buildings and – of course – those mummies.

Of particular interest is the story of those who set out to discover Egypt’s ancient past. These include the Victorian adventurers who deciphered hieroglyphics and who walked into tombs that had remained untouched for centuries.

As with The Tudors For Dummies, there is nothing of specific interest: however, this series of books should be used for just one thing. An introduction. The Worm’s whistle has been whetted; ancient Egypt is no longer a topic off his reading limits.

Charlotte Booth's website

Buy it here

#233 The Betrayal of Richard III (1959)

Author: V.B. Lamb
Title: The Betrayal of Richard III
Genre: History
Year: 1965
Pages: 110
Origin: bought in a charity shop for £2.99
Nod Rating: 3 nods out of 5

 

The discovery of Richard III’s body in a Leicester car-park has provoked debate and activity within this period of history. Lamb’s book, The Betrayal of Richard III, could just as easily fit in as a freshly published book in 2013, despite it being originally published in the 1950s.

Lamb attempts to do away with hundreds of years of whitewashing and Tudor propaganda. Instead of the villainous Richard who, as Shakespeare once wrote, murdered his brother, a king and his son, his wife, and nephews, the case of Richard’s innocence is put forward. The villainy lies not with Richard’s actions, but rather with the treachery of those he surrounded himself with.

The reader is shown the beginnings of Richard, his reign as king, his removal and then the succeeding historical writing that has painted the former king – arguably England’s last true king – in an unfavourable light. Lamb’s chapter ‘The Legend is Established’ looks at the histories of Polydore Vergil, whilst other chapters concentrate on Sir Thomas More and Shakespeare’s involvement in the traditional view of Richard as the scheming tyrant who got his just deserts.

It is refreshing to see the flipside to this established debate. However, such is Lamb’s blindness that annoyance is a constant factor within this read. Richard, no longer the villain, is taken to the extreme: portrayed as a saint. Let us read a few examples:

‘There is no truth in the story that the people turned against him; his downfall was brought about by a combination of adverse circumstances, the disloyalty of three discontented nobles, and one scheming woman.’

All of which ignores the importance and causes of the small rebellions against Richard, as well as the reasoning behind the Stanleys switch of allegiance between Richard and his successor, Henry Tudor. Also, we have this:

‘Entirely loyal himself, he was unable to recognise treachery in others or to deal with it with sufficient ruthlessness.’

This, the same Richard who had some of his closest advisors and friends – Hastings and Buckingham – alienated and then executed.

Lamb speaks of ‘facts’; but cannot see the woods for the trees. Furthermore, Lamb uses the defence of “no evidence” time and again. Yes, there may be minimal evidence for some of these events, but this does not mean the historian should simply shrug and move on. No, the historian – a historian who wishes to piece together the dots – must go beyond and attempt to weave together a narrative with the best information possible.

However, despite being a book ignored for its flaws, the book should be read and enjoyed for this very reason. There are many mistakes and annoyances, particularly in Lamb’s ignorance of reality. However, like a good pantomime, it is nice to have a read every now and then in which the Worm is shouting at the words running on the line.

Richard continues to have both his detractors and supporters. The recent find of his body will undoubtedly encourage more scholarly activity. Hopefully it keeps the same spirit of Lamb’s work, but instead injected with reason and intelligence.

 
Buy it here

#232 Confessions of a Transsexual Porn Star (2007)

Author: Meghan Chavalier
Title: Confessions of a Transsexual Porn Star
Genre: Autobiography
Year: 2007
Pages: 220
Origin: read on the good old Kindle
Nod Rating: 1 nod out of 5
 

 

Undoubtedly, this book has the most bizarre title that the Worm has yet to read. Yes, dear readers, it beats – hands down – other winners of the Odd Book Title Award, including the toilet history Flushed With Pride and even the poetry volume Once I Was A Washing Machine.

As it says on the tin, Confessions of a Transsexual Porn Star follows the life of a transsexual within the porn industry. Meghan Chavalier is an interesting character: originally born a male, who later found adventure in various locations around the United States, before eventually entering the porn industry. Today, as her intriguing website demonstrates, she has attempted to forge together the role of author of transgendered books and singer of low-budget music videos.

The book is a refreshingly honest look at one of the planet’s biggest industries. Chavalier attempts to tell the nitty-gritty of the porn industry behind the scenes, including some revelations of the rich and famous:

‘A guy called and said he wanted to party. My friend told him that there were three of us there and he was interested in all of us. He didn’t take long to show up and when he did my friend asked him to show her his dick so that we could make sure he wasn’t a cop. I wasn’t really looking at him at this point and honestly didn’t care who he was until I realised it was C.S. I told my friend she didn’t need to worry about him because he was a movie star. He came in and he was obviously drunk and high on something. I think this was around the time that he was going through all of his drug problems. C.S. is definitely a sex freak.’

C.S. Hmm… Charlie Sheen, anyone?

Her book, thankfully, is not centred fully on the porn industry. Rather, it is a tale of her early years and eventual transformation. It expresses more of her doubts, confusion and uncertainty of her youthful years. All of which could have been very engrossing, if only the book was not written in a sloppy manner, thereby aggravating the Worm on many pages. Undoubtedly, it would have benefited from proof-reading and some structural editing to avoid repetition.

Chavalier writes of the experience of putting together the book: ‘Most people thought that it must’ve taken me a long time to write my first book, honestly, it only took me two weeks.’ And here, folks, is the problem.

 
Buy it here

#231 The Eugenics Wars (2001)

Author: Greg Cox
Title: The Eugenics Wars: The Rise and Fall of Khan Noonien Singh (Volume 1)
Genre: Science Fiction
Year: 2001
Pages: 390
Origin: read on the good old Kindle
Nod Rating: 2 nods out of 5

 

Whilst reading Star Trek articles on Wikipedia – as one does – the Worm somehow stumbled upon the expanded universe that seemingly incorporate millions of novels featuring the likes of Captain Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard. One particular two-part series struck the Worm’s imagination: a secret history of the twentieth century that combined the character of Khan (recently resurrected in the blockbuster Star Trek Into Darkness) and a minor creation from the original series, Gary Seven. Science fiction and history had collided together: this was all the Worm needed to get reading.

In Star Trek mythology the Eugenics Wars was an event that occurred in the 1990s; a race of supermen took control of the planet, before being jettisoned into outer-space. This outlined was written as part of the original series in the 1960s, when the 1990s seemed a long way off. The character Khan – the leader of these supermen – resurfaced in a motion picture, establishing himself as a cult villain within the canon. This book, written by Greg Cox, returns to the original source material. But rather than place Khan in outer space in the distant future, he attempts something slightly more radical: the story of Khan’s time on Earth in the 1970s, 1980s and 1990s. What’s more, in an attempt to tie in Earth’s real history as well as the imagined Star Trek universe, Khan’s place within these decades is formed as a “secret history”, using real events such as the fall of Communism and ethnic cleansing in the hope of producing a page-turning adventure story.

This volume – the first of two – is set in the early 1970s. Khan is a child prodigy and generally an unknown quantity; his home environment – a giant research laboratory – is besieged by Gary Seven and his accomplices (Roberta Lincoln). Seven succeeds in destroying the work of “evil” scientists, but the fall out of this means that the planet is under threat of a young generation of potential power-hungry super-beings.

Cox attempts to build a thriller full of suspense, blending real events with his imagination: all of which can be deemed a success. Of course, Cox is no Shakespeare… or indeed, any other in-depth, gripping writer (of which there are only truly a few). However, his novel is one of action, if not emotional or intellectual depth. The Worm was mostly hooked with the weaving together of fiction and non-fiction; unfortunately for the outcome of the novel, Cox appears to have missed a few open goals in terms of real-life events to feed from.

As such, this volume – and Star Trek fiction as a whole - is commendable, but unfortunately not recommendable to those outside the science fiction family.

 

Buy it here

#230 The Tudors For Dummies (2010)

Author: David Loades & Mei Trow
Title: The Tudors For Dummies
Genre: History
Year: 2010
Pages: 360
Origin: read on the Kindle
Nod Rating: 2 nods out of 5

 

The Dummies series of books is seemingly everywhere. The trademark and standout yellow of its covers can be found in all good – and bad – bookshops, from high cost to the bargain basement. They have found success is taking dense subject matter and breaking it down for the unwashed masses in the hope of enlightening us all. There are around two-thousand (yes, two-thousand!!) titles in the series. It is a surprise to the Worm, then, that he has not gotten his mitts on one of them.

This all changes with The Tudors For Dummies title in the series. At the helm of this book is a duo authorship of David Loades and Mei Trow. Loades is well known in Tudor-reading circles as a man who has researched and written heavily on the Tudor monarchs Henry VIII and Mary. Less well known to the Worm is Mei Trow: a historian and novelist who has appeared on documentaries as both expert and presenter. A dream-team of Tudor history? Let us find out.

The Tudors For Dummies devotes sections to the “Big Tudors” (Henry VII, Henry VIII, and Elizabeth), as well as one on the “Little Tudors” (the ill-fated Edward VI and Mary – deemed by the authors as the ‘Forgotten Tudors’). Furthermore, the book – like others in the Dummies series – devotes a section to ‘The Part of Tens’. This is a countdown list of ‘Tudor people’, of architecture, events, and other ‘Tudor firsts’.

The proceedings are all as to be expected: the Battle of Bosworth, the troubles of Henry VII’s reign with imposters and pretenders, the passing of the baton to the next generation, and his son’s desire to become a king feared by all. The section on Edward and Mary are of interest, with the author duo feeling enabled to go off the script and pick out some intriguing snippets of detail. But the main action is resumed with the section ‘Ending with Elizabeth.’ The reader is treated to her battles with religion and then the greater threat of the Spanish and their Armada fleet. The book is neatly wrapped up, with a short examination of the Tudors’ lasting legacy to Britain.

Although there is minimal detail, luckily the book is spruced up with anecdotes and appealing facts; all of which makes the reading experience a pleasurable one. Furthermore, Loades is unshackled from his usual academic sphere, adding a sense of personality to the chief Tudor protagonists. For example, how about this on Henry VIII: ‘Henry began his reign promisingly enough as a handsome, talented Renaissance prince with a 19-inch waist, but he became a bloated monster who terrified his subjects and whose soul the pope sent to hell’. Furthermore, we are also treated to the humour behind the relationship of Henry and Anne Boleyn: ‘Henry certainly fell for Anne, the daughter of a Kentish knight, longing, in his own words, to “kiss her pretty dukkys”. Dukkies meaning – of course – her breasts.

This is the first For Dummies read for the Worm. Although it failed to deliver the dizzy highs of inventive and authoritative history writing, it entertained and filled in gaps of knowledge. It is not comprehensive, but serves as a solid introduction to the Tudors of the sixteenth century. Therefore, the Worm will be back for more reads in the For Dummies series.

 

Buy it here!

#229 The Story of Writing (1995)

Author: Andrew Robinson
Title: The Story of Writing
Genre: Language
Year: 1995
Pages: 220
Origin: a tried and trusted library book
Nod Rating: 3 nods out of 5

 

‘Writing is among the greatest inventions in human history, perhaps the greatest invention, since it made history possible.’

This is the central argument within Andrew Robinson’s engaging book The Story of Writing. In the space of two hundred well-designed pages, Robinson manages to chart writing’s history: from the early days of cave paintings to its various branches and off-shoots. The Worm finds such boasting of ‘350 illustrations, 50 in colour’ as rather endearing; harking back to innocent times when colour was a feature that was useable as a bragging instrument. However, there is a greater seriousness within the print itself.

Robinson focuses on some of the key developments in writing. These include the story of the decipherment of the Rosetta Stone; extinct forms of writing (including cuneiform and hieroglyphs, as well as the interesting Linear B script); as well as those pesky undecipherable scripts such as Cretan Linear B, Etruscan inscriptions and the fabulously named Rongorongo. We chart the evolution of the alphabet, with a particular focus on Chinese and Japanese and how it exits within the media and society in the present day.

The reader is treated to various detours down confusing alleyways of human language, forever turning back upon Egyptian hieroglyphics (of which the author is assuredly obsessed). Like the splendid Bill Bryson, Robinson picks up the story of those daring adventurers who deciphered the ancient scripts in the Victorian period. These include the likes of such enigmatic names as Jean-Francois Champollion and Sir Henry Creswicke Rawlinson.

The Worm can safely say that he has never read a more authoritative and entertaining book on hieroglyphics. In fact, the Worm has never read a book on hieroglyphics; which makes the first sentence of this paragraph appear rather redundant. However, the Worm confidently states that the read caused much chin-stroking merriment that he will consider reading subsequent books on hieroglyphics; on which the author, Andrew Robinson, is clearly to thank. The Story of Writing is not a classic of a text, and perhaps – and quite rightly should be if research continues – it will be superseded within a time. However, it is an entertaining text that makes the throat utter glottal sounds of wonder at the discovery of the vast amount of facts that abound on every page. With the reader now knowing the Worm’s depth of hieroglyphic knowledge, they can be content with feeling secure that The Story of Writing can provide a nice introduction into this confusing, bamboozling and wonderful world.

 Buy it here

#228 The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (1892)

Author: Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
Title: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Short Fiction
Year: 1892
Pages: 300
Origin: read on the Kindle
Nod Rating: 4 nods out of 5

In recent years, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle has received amorous glances from the Worm. Two book-reading seasons ago the first Sherlock Holmes adventure, A Study in Scarlet, was read; whilst last year’s book reading season began with a read of The Sign of the Four. What better way, then, to kick-off this (rather delayed) review than with yet another from the Sherlock Holmes collection.

The twelve stories that make up The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (A Scandal in Bohemia, The Adventure of the Red-Headed League, A Case of Identity, The Boscombe Valley Mystery, The Five Orange Pips, The Man with the Twisted Lip, The Adventure of the Blue Carbuncle, The Adventure of the Speckled Band, The Adventure of the Engineer’s Thumb, The Adventure of the Noble Bachelor, The Adventure of the Beryl Coronet, The Adventure of the Copper Beeches) were first published in the Strand Magazine between 1891 and 1892; being collected and sold in book form later in 1892. They show Sherlock Holmes and his trusted companion, Doctor Watson, in a series of adventures in which the duo really come into their own; establishing the power of a myth that has endured right through to the present day.

These twelve short stories manage to show Holmes at work in a greater variety of situations that the previous novels. Again, the distinction is drawn between the shut-down when not working on a case, as he drifts into his ‘drug-created dreams’ before arising when ‘hot upon the scent of a new problem’. As Holmes himself explains, he feeds and thrives off the action of the cases of crime: ‘It saved me from ennui… my life is spent in one long effort to escape from the commonplaces of existence. These little problems help me to do so.’

Holmes’ unorthodox practices and reasoning is further detailed by a mystified and intrigued Watson. This includes Holmes needing to go into a slumber when smoking what he deems ‘a three-pipe problem’:

‘He curled himself up in his chair, with his thin knees drawn to his hawk-like nose, and there he sat with his eyes closed and his black clay pipe thrusting out like the bill of some strange bird. I had come to the conclusion that he had dropped asleep, and indeed was nodding myself, when he suddenly sprang out of his chair with the gesture of a man who has made up his mind and put his pipe down upon the mantelpiece.’

We also witness Holmes becoming the master of disguise (in A Scandal in Bohemia), in which Watson describes the change: ‘It was not merely that Holmes changed his costume. His expression, his manner, his very soul seemed to vary with every fresh part that he assumed. The stage lost a fine actor, even as science lost an acute reasoner, when he became a specialist in crime.’ Furthermore, the growth of Watson’s own deductive powers are much improved; although there are plenty of sharp comments from the chief detective: ‘You see, but you do not observe.’

The collection established the Holmes-Watson connection. Furthermore, it has cemented the legend of other characters, notably that of Irene Adler (‘To Sherlock Holmes she is always the woman’). The short story format provides greater energy to Holmes-Watson tag-team. The earlier novels (A Study in Scarlet and The Sign of the Four) lose interest throughout the reading experience; far better to concentrate Holmes within smaller – and sillier – mysteries that allow his full personality to spill out onto the page. For this principal reason, the Worm sees 4 nods as a fitting return for stories that have cemented themselves as classics.

 

Buy it here

Read the Worm's review of A Study in Scarlet here

Or his review of The Sign of the Four  here

Forever Delayed: 2012-13 Season Review

Regular readers of this blog may have asked themselves in recent months: “Where is the usual twelve-month end of season review?” The Worm himself has managed to avoid the vast number of petitions set up and sent to 10 Downing Street in order to bring about a decision on the “Missing End of Season Review” debate currently being waged throughout these islands. But even the Worm has come to a conclusion: enough is enough. It can be delayed no longer!

What is the reason for such a delay (coming around three to four months than per usual)? One of the founding fathers of the United States, Benjamin Franklin, once said: “You may delay, but time will not.” This is true. However, a rival founding father – Thomas Jefferson – also wrote that “delay is preferable to error.” Try to think of the Worm working away in his basement, surrounded by the books of the past year, his hair a mess and bags under eyes due to lack of sleep and worry: just who deserves to earn a slot in the Top Ten List?!!

Seasons past have been kinder to the Worm. There have been sure winners and losers, the good reads and the bad reads. And since the early days – the beginning of 2009 – the “Noddies” have attached such a large importance that the Oscars have attempted to copy certain elements (a court case is currently pending on this issue!). Just who was to win Read of the Year; which book was to come away with the high acclaim; and which book would find itself the unwilling bearer of the Shredder Award – all big questions. No wonder that Dave Cameron wanted to settle the matter once and for all.

In total 52 books were read from July 2012 to the end of June 2013. These ranged from the usual suspect genres of novels and history books, to also include political and language-based reads. The very first read of the year (reviewed in August 2012) was Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes tale, The Sign of Four; and the last was the recently reviewed short story The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. Neither of these reads found themselves in the eagerly anticipated Top Ten reads of 2012-13:

 

1)      Selected Poems by T.S. Eliot (5 nods)

Previous winners of Read of the Year have included two autobiographies concentrated on the Second World War (by William Shirer and Primo Levi), sandwiched in-between William Faulkner’s The Sound and the Fury. This time around, no book was stronger than this fantastic collection from T.S. Eliot. Contained are his early works (Prufrock), the mesmeric 'The Wasteland', and highlights of later collections.

 

2)      A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams (5 nods)

Also breaking the pattern of the three previous seasons is a play high up on the list (the previous highest ranked play came from Bill Shakespeare’s Macbeth in Season 2009-10). Williams creates believable and relatable characters in mid-twentieth century New Orleans. Following the unravelling of Blanche keeps the reader hooked, line and sinker.

3)      A Hero of Our Time – Mikhail Lermontov (5 nods)

One of the finest works of nineteenth century Russian literature (a time of great heavyweights). Lermontov died incredibly young – from an unfortunate duel when in his late twenties – but he has left this intriguing novel for later generations to admire. It follows a complicated character and his attempts to find his rightful place in the world.

4)      Richard III – William Shakespeare (5 nods)

Shakespeare is no stranger to these end of season lists; in both 2009-10 and 2010-11 he nabbed a slot with his word-playing trickery. Richard III is perhaps one of his best known plays; a myth being created against this son of York that has lasted centuries.

5)      The Importance of Being Earnest – Oscar Wilde (5 nods)

The Worm – before assuming the alias of the Worm – once read Wilde’s The Portrait of Dorian Gray; he found it slightly dull and was put off Wilde for a couple of years. This play makes up for all the time lost. Funny and inventive, it shows Wilde’s wit at his best.

6)      V For Vendetta – Alan Moore (4 nods)

Forget the recent film and instead immerse yourself in the 1980s comic run of V For Vendetta. It shows a writer during the rise of his powers, with scripts and artwork that is captivating and entertaining.

7)      The Spanish Civil War – Hugh Thomas (4 nods)

The Worm thoroughly enjoyed reading this during the summer of 2012. Around 1,000 pages of historical thriller; it is incredible how Thomas manages to explain the complexities of the war and yet maintain a narrative of one of the central clashes of recent history.

8)      The Dark Knight Returns – Frank Miller (4 nods)

A second entry for graphic novels. This particular one has shaped the character and world of Batman since it hit the shelves in the mid-1980s. It’s legacy may well be dampened with regretful news of a possible Superman v Batman film on the horizon; return to the original source material and see an epic fight of fisticuffs between the Dark Knight and Man of Steel.

9)      How I Escaped My Certain Fate – Stewart Lee (4 nods)

Stewart Lee is one of the cleverest and perceptive voices in the media today. This book – a collection of transcripts (and general musings) is a delight to read. If you wish to escape the drudgery of the bog-standard comedy slopped out on TV today, start looking up Mr Lee right away.

10)  In Cold Blood – Truman Capote (4 nods)

A haunting and – at times – frustrating read. Capote’s book, based on real life events, turns right and left throughout; but its importance and lasting legacy cannot be denied. An interesting thriller that attempts to delve into the human psyche.

 

And what of the category awards:

Read of the Year: Selected Poems by T.S. Eliot

Novel: A Hero of Our Time by Mikhail Lermontov

Short Story: The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman

Play: A Streetcar Named Desire – Tennessee Williams

Poetry: Selected Poems by T.S. Eliot

History: The Spanish Civil War by Hugh Thomas

Thinker: Guns by Stephen King

Political: Eichmann and the Holocaust by Hannah Arendt

Autobiographical: How I Escaped My Certain Fate by Stewart Lee

Graphic Novel: V For Vendetta by Alan Moore

Longest Read: The Spanish Civil War – 1,000 pages

Shortest Read: Guns – 25 pages

Oldest Read: Richard III – 1591

Bizarre Title: The Darwin Wars

Shredder Award: Marvel’s Iron Man 3 Prelude

Out of the 52 reads only five gained the full 5 nods! In terms of reading formats, the Kindle showed a notable rise (a total of 12 reads), becoming tied with the tried and trusted method of second hand books. In terms of the Genre Wars, History won the season’s title with a total of 11 reads, just 1 ahead of novels. The only other rival to this was the graphic novel, gaining a total of 9 reads.

The Worm could go on with such stats, but he is quite aware that they are meaningless and rather pointless. Furthermore, Prime Minister Cameron is now at the door: he demands closure on this review and its wonderful revelations. Hath no fear, fellow dear readers, the Worm will continue forward into the fifth season; already 25 books have been consumed. Their reviews will be posted shortly!

#227 The Yellow Wallpaper (1892)

Author: Charlotte Perkins Gilman
Title: The Yellow Wallpaper
Genre: Short Story
Year: 1892
Pages: 25
Origin: read on the Kindle
Nod Rating: 4 nods out of 5

 

‘But what is one to do?’

The Worm first came across the interesting writer that is Charlotte Perkins Gilman a few years ago in a dusty and musty copy of Herland. Written and set in the first two decades of the twentieth century, a small group of men come across a tribe of women who have lived for generations without the use of males. It is a seminal feminist text, and it blew the Worm away in its pioneering spirit and refusal to bow down to the gender difference nonsense of its period (for example, this was written before females had the right to vote in elections).

All of which is it is a travesty that the Worm has not returned to Perkins Gilman sooner. Her short story, The Yellow Wallpaper, is also one referenced by feminist thinkers in the previous century. Its narrator discusses her rest in a bed, and bit by bit she descends into madness with a running connection to the wallpaper within her bedroom:

‘I never saw a worse paper in my life. One of those sprawling flamboyant patterns committing every artistic sin. It is dull enough to confuse the eye in following, pronounced enough to constantly irritate and provoke study, and when you follow the lame uncertain curves for a little distance they suddenly commit suicide – plunge off at outrageous angles, destroy themselves in unheard of contradictions.’

The wallpaper serves a confessional purpose: ‘There are things in that paper that nobody knows but me, or ever will.’ And it serves another purpose to the reader, as well: an implicit message of the struggle of women in their male dominated world:

‘The front pattern does move – and no wonder! The woman behind shakes it! Sometimes I think there are a great many women behind, and sometimes only one, and she crawls around fast, and her crawling shakes it all over. Then in the very bright spots she keeps still, and in the very shady spots she just takes hold of the bars and shakes them hard. And she is all the time trying to climb through. But nobody could climb through that pattern – it strangles so…’

Rather than find understanding in her husband, the narrator is patronised (‘Bless her little heart’). Her desired liberation from insanity – and Perkins Gilman’s message of the liberation of women from their enslavement – comes to nothing but a bloody (and confusing) end: ‘Now why should that man have fainted? But he did, and right across my path by the wall, so that I had to creep over him every time!’

Charlotte Perkins Gilman was a woman who lived life on her own terms (deciding to ‘chose chloroform over cancer’ in a suicide note in the 1935). She could have found a wider audience in the twenty-first century, yet works such as The Yellow Wallpaper have found an enduring readership. Not just for the implicit message, but also in her ability to weave words together. The Yellow Wallpaper is heartedly recommended read.

 

Buy it here

#226 Politics and the English Language (1946)

Author: George Orwell
Title: Politics and the English Language
Genre: Language
Year: 1946
Pages: 30
Origin: read on the Kindle for 99p
Nod Rating: 3 nods out of 5

‘A writer who is still vividly contemporary… Orwell told the truth’
 Christopher Hitchens
 
The Worm cannot add to the vast collection of superlatives attached to George Orwell. The more the Worm reads, the more he subscribes to the view that Orwell is a heavyweight – and perhaps lynchpin – of twentieth century English fiction.

However, this essay – Politics and the English Language – is not fiction, but rather an analysis of the state of language. Within it he attacks the seeming debasement of the English language; a vehicle hijacked by political demagogues and slack thinkers. Orwell believes that writers have lost their grip on the essentials, and as a result both writer and reader are in a race for the bottom.

Such ideas would be expanded on greatly in one of his most popular works, Nineteen Eighty-Four (particular in the restriction placed on the concept language Newspeak: “doubleplusgood”). And in this essay, Orwell rallies against complacency, the misuses and abuses of the English language:

‘Most people who bother with the matter at all would admit that the English is in a bad way, but it is generally assumed that we cannot by conscious action do anything about it. Our civilization is decadent, and our language – so the argument runs – must inevitably share in the general collapse. It follows that any struggle against the abuse of language is a sentimental archaism, like preferring candles to electric light or hansom cabs to aeroplanes. Underneath this lies the half-conscious belief that language is a natural growth and not an instrument which we shape for our own purposes. Now, it is clear that the decline of a language must ultimately have political and economic causes: it is not due simply to the bad influences of this or that individual writer…. Modern English, especially written English, is full of bad habits which spread by imitation and which can be avoided if one is willing to take the necessary trouble. If one gits rid of these habits one can think more clearly, and to think clearly is a necessary first step towards political regeneration: so that the fight against bad English is not frivolous and is not the exclusive concern of professional writers.’

In order to combat this, Orwell constructs a manifesto of Six Rules. The first is never to use a metaphor or simile which you are used to seeing in print and to avoid ‘dying metaphors’ and ‘phrases tacked together like the sections of a pre-fabricated henhouse’. The second is to always use short words, rather than long ones in the hope of gaining ‘precision’. The third recommends always cutting out words if possible. The fourth: use the active voice, rather than passive. The firth rule asks the writer to avoid foreign and scientific words, and especially useless jargon and ‘meaningless words’; hopefully this would remove ‘pretentious diction’. The sixth rule: break any of the above rules rather than say anything ‘barbarous’.

The Worm has mused over these rules, but admits that he has often contradicted them (after all, he believes his book reviews are all ‘sound and fury, signifying nothing’!). And even Orwell breaks the manifesto rules, admitting as much in this essay. However, if such rules are kept in mind, then Orwell hopes that ‘staleness of imagery’ and ‘lack of precision’ can be avoided.

Orwell could be accused of being a pedant. He is scathing of other writers, but he is both clinical and playful in his condemnation of ‘bad English’. The writing – as adhered by his own standards – remains fresh and exciting; just as if it was written in 2013, and not 1946. He remains an honest voice in a sea of filthy lies.

Apologies, George, but an ending metaphor was the best this Worm could do.

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