Dracula - Bram Stoker

Bram Stoker – Dracula (1897)
Novel – 450 pages – my copy (paperback; 1994) bought for 80p from a Cornish charity shop, sometime in 2008
- 3 nods out of 5 -

‘I’ve never ran from no one, but I’m terrified of you
See my heartbeat is a slow one, but I’m terrified of you
I’ve been around for ages, but I’m terrified of you…’
‘Dracula’s Wedding’, Outkast, 2003

The lyric above stands as testimony of the enduring popularity of Dracula. Written over one hundred years ago, the villain was a sensation in print, then upon the big screen in the 1930s, leading to repeated renditions in cinema and television, sung in song and rhymed in rap lyrics to the modern day.

It is easy to see the appeal: a venomous bad-guy, almost impossible to beat, who rips apart the innocents who come up against him. Bram Stoker conjured a magnificent beast, and his novel remains alive in the twenty-first century as it did at the tail-end of the nineteenth. And it is not the strength of the enemy alone that maintains such freshness; Stoker’s fast paced cutting between various viewpoints – including journals and newspaper articles – details the fears of the characters, while allowing Dracula himself to remain elusive and a teasing mystery.

But despite Dracula’s strength and wrath, there is one chief failing of Stoker’s novel: the aura of finality. Despite a large casualty during the plot – being poor Lucy – the remaining ensemble carry on, page after page, counting down to the inevitable showdown with the Count. It is the conclusion so many of our horror, our mystery, our action and our science fiction writers cannot do without: the triumph of good over evil. Critiques can find easy reasoning for such an end, including the mighty of the Victorian British Empire versus alien forces, of Christian goodness against the unbeliever; but whatever it may be labelled, the lack of ending climax remains lacklustre and unwanted.

Such a failing is not helped by the padding of many characters. If Quincy Morris is slightly animated – the stereotypical Victorian American – and if Dr Seward is the most reflective, thoughtful of the band of vampire crusaders, there is plenty of dead wood in Jonathan Harker and the non-entity that is Lord Godalming. An ace, however, is at hand in the form of Dr Van Hesling. Here is a lively and entertaining construct, an injection of blood to colour the pages – vitally needed towards the book’s end when the band take to the continent in what is a tepid search for Dracula.

Quite bluntly, for today’s reader, Dracula is too long and perhaps a touch too tame. But although the majority of the characters and their desperate pleas for God’s salvation may bite upon our patience, here stands a bona fide Class A villain. As such, Dracula stands upon other villainous classics – notably Frankenstein – as a read not to be missed, despite its flaws.

Blood & Guts - Roy Porter

Roy Porter - Blood & Guts (2002)
Science Related – 200 pages – my copy (hardback; 2002) bought for £1 from Plymouth Library
- 2 nods out of 5 -

Blood and Guts – what an intriguing title! That was the Worm’s first impression when picking up Roy Porter’s short history of medicine, promising a quick and succinct journey through the ages in all themes and issues. Exactly what a reader would need when attempting to fill in the gaps of a large and complex history, full off interesting snippets of trivia and facts.

Although the title suggests a playful tone – including the book’s cover in which a cartoon of an eighteenth century gentleman squirms as a doctor, rather painfully, inserts a needle into his nose – Porter’s prose starkly contrasts. The reader is given a rather dry recitation of past ages, covering the major themes: disease, doctors, the laboratory, therapies, surgeries, and the hospital. Rather than the expected easy narration – ala Bill Bryson – we are dipped into various terminologies, theories and practitioners. There is so much, in such a short space, it is akin to information overload.

However, a greater accusation to the author’s abilities is the book’s likeness to articles upon Wikipedia. There is little humour, little excitement; but rather a Gradgrind reliance upon facts, facts and just the facts. The Worm has no wish to tarnish Porter’s credentials: the book’s jacket trumpets them just fine (before his recent passing he was Professor in Social History of Medicine at University College London). But this knowledge does not translate to a science lay-worm.

Blood & Guts has one redeeming feature: its illustrations. Each of them are wonderful and enlightening, with images throughout history fantastically picked by the author to adorn the text. True 5 nodder illustration; but the book itself fails to deliver on the Worm’s initial expectations. For the fun and the facts, a reader would be better served by buying a copy of Bryson’s A Short History of Nearly Everything.

Invisible Republic - Greil Marcus

Greil Marcus – Invisible Republic: Bob Dylan’s Basement Tapes (1997)
Music – 270 pages – my copy (paperback; 1998) bought for 99p from Plymouth’s Works in June 2010
- 2 nods out of 5 -

One would assume a book with Bob Dylan’s name in the subtitle, joined with a photograph of Bob Dylan upon the cover, as well as the promise of a study of Bob Dylan’s music would actually manage to mention Bob Dylan. The Worm assumed just as much; but with Greil Marcus, assumption appears to have no weight in his books upon music and culture.

Ostensibly, Invisible Republic is a study of Bob Dylan’s time with The Band in the basement of a house known as the Big Pink during 1967. Their time in this basement brought about history’s most famous bootleg: The Basement Tapes. At first used as successful cover fodder for many acts in the late 1960s, they were official released in the mid 1970s, though various versions still do the rounds upon printed bootlegs and the internet. The recordings came at a juncture for Dylan: after the peace movement and fame of the earlier sixties, after he went electric, after those three defining albums (Bringing It All Back Home, Highway 61 Revisited and Blonde On Blonde) and after his motorbike accident and convalescence.

Marcus gives us this back-story, concentrating upon Dylan’s shock turn to electric guitar in his performances with The Band (or The Hawks, as they were then known). Heckled from the crowd as ‘Judas’ for turning his back on folk, Dylan surged onwards and upwards. The reader then expects a critique of The Basement Tapes, when Marcus completes a 180 and suddenly we’re catapulted into the past of America. It is, to put it mildly, a bumpy ride.

In fact, during this ride Marcus does his best to steer clear of land and towns relating to Dylan and the tapes (bar spending thirty pages upon the song ‘Lo and Behold!’). Instead we are treated to outlaws and protests, to folk singers and metaphysical babblings. Even the aspects that are devoted to Dylan are best left unread, due to their churning sycophantic nature; such as his description of Dylan in the early sixties as ‘no longer merely a singer, or a songwriter, or even a poet, let alone simply a folk musician. In a signal way, he was the Folk, and also a prophet’ (xii). Please, someone, pass the Worm a bucket to vomit in.

What keeps Invisible Republic from joining other infamous books in the 1 nodder sin-bin is Marcus’ sheer disregard of playing by the rules. Yes, he rambles and digresses; but one thing is for sure: this is clearly his show. The message for the reader is, ‘Buckle in and experience the ride.’

101 Cornish Lives - Maurice Smelt

Maurice Smelt – 101 Cornish Lives (2006)
Local History – 250 pages – my copy (paperback; 2006) a gift from Emma, and signed from Mr. Smelting himself
- 2 nods out of 5 -

Throughout history there are thousands upon thousands of forgotten lives and elapsed events. Of course, the big cheeses of history continue onwards: Genghis Khan, Napoleon and Hitler; but for those local luminaries, each passing generation sounds as a nail hitting the wood of a coffin. All the more celebration, then, for local histories! Here the author, Maurice Smelt, presents the reader with one hundred and one Cornish lives; those born at the “fag-end of the country” and went on to become inventors, travellers and great sportsmen.

Smelt’s language never threatens to excite, a gentle plod through some of the most noteworthy and important names in Cornish history. And as common for standard local histories, a game develops of ‘spot the mistake’; this book’s obvious error appearing on page 18, when the philanthropist Ralph Allen is noted as making a fortune for himself in 1620 and serving as mayor of Bath in 1642; even though a page earlier he is stated as being born in 1694. Such mistakes are not a light crime, and are further compounded when reading of Smelt’s academic past (including Major Scholar of Trinity Hall, Cambridge).

But at no point does Smelt falter in his writing, providing us with quick and digestible portraits of famous Cornishmen, from Sir Bevil Grenville to Richard Trevithick, from the past of St Piran to the modern day World Trade Centre hero Rick Rescorla. Smelt is most confident and entertaining in his words upon novelists, poets and historians, including Charles Causley, Crosbie Garstin, Arthur Quiller-Couch and A.L. Rowse. But perhaps the most striking are the complete unknowns who are brought back to life, notably that of the exceptional Mary Bryant, the dubious Tibet monk in Cyril Henry Hoskins, and the erratic and lunatic John Tom.

Of course, it is the usual small county/town/village laying claim to whatever they can lay their hands on; such is the case with world champion boxer Bob Fitzsimmons who left Cornwall when a mere toddler. But on the whole, 101 Cornish Lives is an admirable attempt at bringing the once famous and infamous back to the written page.

Funeral In Berlin - Len Deighton

Len Deighton – Funeral In Berlin (1964)
Novel – 380 pages – my copy (paperback) borrowed from Mr. Mooney in August 2010
- 2 nods out of 5 -

Deighton has become a by-word for spy-fiction. No, not the crusading hero kind of James Bond et al, but rather the thinking man’s spy; not indestructible and completely human. Len Deighton has authored a skyscraper tower of books, from popular novels to non-fiction upon war, and even cookery. This, then, is an author multi-faceted with a large writing tool-kit.

All of which made the Worm’s read of Funeral In Berlin all the more frustrating. One of his earlier novels, the book follows the journey of the un-named principal protagonist within the Berlin mouse-trap of the early 1960s. The Wall has gone up, guns are aimed and ready upon both sides, and the two super-powers of the world have their finger on the trigger of atomic bombs.

But although the setting is ripe for friction, the plot and characterisation is lacking in depth and quality. The plot – simple enough – is filled out with banal visits to, what can be considered for the time, strange and exotic locations. Our un-named hero may not be as dull and unconvincing as James Bond, but there remains a certain finality as to how the story will end. Deighton does not fall into the trap of depicting caricature “bad-guys”; but also fails in providing us with a threat of terror.

Rather than allowing these characters to breathe and speak for themselves, Deighton fills in the character for the reader, repeatedly telling us their habits and mindset. The single chapter headings on each of the main characters initially appears a breath of fresh air within pace of action, but most of it is un-necessary and ultimately detracts from the mysteriousness of the plot itself.

Furthermore, the book becomes steeped in Cold War terminology; Deighton even provides a glossary of terms, from poisonous insecticides to Soviet security systems – again, disrupting the flow of the plot. But this is the lesser crime of the novel’s failings; this is a spy novel, and by default the spy-fan must be given a real, authentic taste of the theme.

Funeral In Berlin remains a big hit with readers; for the Worm it was a poor re-introduction back into Deighton’s back catalogue of fiction. It is a case of twice bitten; but the Worm will be back. Cold War fiction is a dense jungle, and much of it remains to be explored.

Prime Minister Portillo - Duncan Black & Iain Dale (eds.)

Duncan Black & Iain Dale (eds.) – Prime Minister Portillo: and other things that never happened (2003)
Politics – 370 pages – my copy (hardback; 2003) bought for £1 from Plymouth library in July 2010
- 2 nods out of 5 -

Counterfactual histories came in vogue during the early noughties; we had Nazi banners upon Big Ben, a New World colonised by Soviet Russians and a nuclear holocaust wasteland of the 1980s. Most are military based, while the better ones usually involve Niall Ferguson, but where at the “what ifs” of political history?

Editors Duncan Black and Iain Dale responded in 2003 with this edition: Prime Minister Portillo (and other things that never happened). The book’s front cover image, of Portillo smiling at Number 10 Downing Street, proves as an entrance that whatever may be upon the pages will not be as fantastic and surreal as Hitler planting the Nazi flag upon the Moon. This, being British, was going to be all the more subtle and unassuming.

Unfortunately for the reader, the lack of excitement pours cold water upon the book’s promise of taking us upon alternate realities. Take some of the essay titles themselves as proof: ‘What if Benn had beaten Healey in 1981?’ and ‘What if Labour had won in 1970?’ were hardly ever going to set heartbeats racing. Sure, the editors attempt at bringing in larger events, such as Lenin’s arrival in Petrograd in 1917, of John F. Kennedy escaping bullets, but ultimately, too many of these chapters fail to galvanise interest.

The highlights include John Charmley’s essay – ‘What if Halifax had become Prime Minister in 1940?’ – written in the role as historian in an alternative reality; in which Churchill is a joke, rather than a legend. Rather than the “do or die” attitude of historians upon the subject of waging war with Nazi Germany, Charmley instead suggests that staying out of a continental war, between Nazis and Communists, was the best strategy in the long-term.

Sadly, Charmley’s style is not copied throughout the majority of chapters. The general rule appears to be suggesting a momentous change, only to negate it completely. What if the Conservatives had won in 1964? Not much change is the unsatisfying conclusion. What if Ted Heath had gone to the country three weeks earlier in February 1974? Again, not such a big difference. All of which is baffling as to why these questions were picked in the first place. Is it either British political history is simply not that interesting, or that the writers have not made the right choices and developed the right material?

As it stands, these political counterfactuals were always predestined to fall off the library shelves and upon the discount pile – exactly where the Worm found and rescued it. But due to the lack of excitement, the test now is if can weather the future storms and stay upon the Worm’s own shelves. Like Portillo and his Tory leadership candidacy, the prospects are ominous.

Imperial Bedrooms - Bret Easton Ellis

Bret Easton Ellis - Imperial Bedrooms (2010)
Novel – 180 pages - my copy (hardback; 2010) bought for £8 from Waterstone’s, Drake’s Circus, in July 2010
- 3 nods out of 5 -

Brett Easton Ellis has made a career about on an ability to shock his audience: from the drug fuelled parties of a teenager wasteland to the mad and psychotic killings from the hands of Patrick Bateman. Blood has seeped from axes, from children toys and even a cash machine. But what becomes of a middle aged Ellis? Is the reader to expect this is the end of those terrors?

Of course not. Ellis responds to the forties by resurrecting his earliest characters from Less Than Zero, bringing them with him into a mid-life crisis of bloody proportions. Imperial Bedrooms follows Clay as he comes to terms with life on the wrong side of forty in the L.A. of the twenty first century.

The most striking aspect of Ellis’ latest novel is the appearance of an actual plot line, reflecting a continuing trend in his writing style, following on from the publication of Lunar Park in 2005. Ellis’ previous novels had characters meandering about, bumping into one another (amongst the drug taking, slashing and general feelings of apathy); whereas in Imperial Bedrooms we get the structure of a genre, that of thriller. The reader follows Clay during an unravelling, we watch as he picks up clues, the plot – if the Worm may indulge – indeed thickening. Unfortunately, most of this ‘plot’ is Clay talking to people on his iPhone, reading texts on his iPhone, sending off emails on, yes, you guessed, his iPhone.

There are the usual themes of Ellis’ fiction: alienation, loneliness, and the blurring of dream and reality. It follows the tone of Lunar Park, but Imperial Bedrooms is a poor successor. Less Than Zero had its youth to define and justify it; whereas the forty-something Clay has no redeeming qualities. The evil and twisted ending sex scenes – fitting for the pages of American Psycho itself – leave the reader confused, more than enlightened. But is this the novelist’s overall purpose? In the book’s opening pages, Clay himself disputes all that came before, the novel and the resulting movie of Less Than Zero, reacting to the previous ‘moral compass.’ Is Imperial Bedrooms, then, Ellis’ attempt to set the record straight? Who is to know amongst the confusion; all that is clear is the lack of guilt, the absence of remorse. Here, King Hedonism resigns supreme.

Imperial Bedrooms is a book of obvious limitations. But its thriller aspect, its overall short length – especially when so many books these days are bloated (Glamorama included) – make this a page turner and worthy 3 nodder.

Live Ethically - Peter McBride

Peter MacBride – Live Ethically (2008)
Lifestyle – 200 pages – my copy (paperback; 2010) bought for £9.99 from Waterstone’s, Drake’s Circus, in August 2010
- 2 nods out of 5 -

Yes, we all know we should reduce, reuse and recycle – but the initial struggle is picking up these useful patterns to aid us throughout our lives. Live Ethically is a beginner’s guide to do just that. In two hundred pages the author – Peter MacBride- takes us on a journey of energy usage, of ethical shopping, to our impact on travel and much more in-between.

Recent decades have brought onwards the promotion of ethical living, creating greater awareness our decisions have on the world around us. Much of this isn’t designated for the “hippy” element of society, nor for those educated or wealthy enough; to paraphrase my dear friend Tom Paine, this is common sense.

MacBride is an amiable host, helping the reader make these possible decisions a reality; from the simplicity of turning off a light to the possibility of switching banks to one that will be responsible with your money (no big bonuses and no funding of weapons of mass destruction). There is a sliding scale on each of these actions, therefore no need to feel daunted or overwhelmed. Throughout the book are adjoining illustrations, and more importantly an extensive list of websites in which to immediately visit to start making a life an ethical one.

What is refreshing about Live Ethically is the absence of preaching on the holiness of these ethical decisions and the brimstone and fire of our current lives. As an unassuming guide, this book isn’t a classic comparable to Shakespeare; but it may help the reader to open the mind.

Common Sense - Thomas Paine

Thomas Paine – Common Sense (1776)
Political – read as an iPhone app, August 2010
- 5 nods out of 5 -

A book that is said to have sparked the American Revolution; no small feat, for sure. But then Thomas Paine was no small man, exerting a large influence across the Western world during the later half of the revolutionary and changing eighteenth century.

Common Sense was published anonymously in 1776; it instantly gripped the readership of the Atlantic seaboard colonies, helping to clarify the American opposition to British dominance whilst also catapulting Paine to fame in the process. Historians have waxed lyrically about the pamphlet’s importance, and the Worm sees fit to continue in this rightful tradition.

Throughout this short and exciting pamphlet, Paine speaks of the ridiculousness of the English constitution, on the chance of hereditary succession, before moving onto the possible greatness of an independent, strong and vibrant America. It is crazy, he claims, for a small island to rule a mighty continent; and he backs this up with many concrete arguments: the gulf in distance between the two – a whole ocean – meant it was harder to communicate and govern; as well as the makeup of the American people coming from all of Europe and not just Britain herself. The biggest point was the selfishness of British involvement, there in America for its own profit and not for the benefit of the continental people.

Many of these points had been raised previously; however, Paine brought these points to the people. Unlike other political and philosophical writing of the time, Paine has done away with the Latin and learned references, instead preferring for an easy to read style upon a common language that makes his writing so easy and enjoyable to read today. Here are references for every man to understand, that of the Bible! Paine’s prose brings us passion, drama, ethics and a powerful, overriding belief in what is right.

As with his later works, Paine paints the ills of the time, as well as proscribing possible cures. Common Sense is awash with ideas for the future, even going into specifics (as he does in Rights of Man) of how a free America should be governed, including that of a revolving presidency between the original thirteen colonies.

Relative to the population of the time, the book is the most popular in American history. Characteristically, Paine donated his proceeds to the upkeep of the Continental Army, who were locking horns with the British, fighting for Paine’s vision of a free America. Common Sense is a must read for those with an interest in politics, in the founding of America and all lovers of liberty.

Wide Sargasso Sea - Jean Rhys

Jean Rhys – Wide Sargasso Sea (1966)
Novel – 125 pages - my copy (Penguin paperback; 2001) bought frantically in December 2006 four days before my Literature exam
- 3 nods out of 5 -

Jane Eyre is noted as one of the finest novels of English fiction; enjoyed and studied by thousands each and every year. Jean Rhys’ Wide Sargasso Sea, written one hundred years later, is less well known. But both novels share a link; the first shows the manic character of Bertha, while the second brings out Bertha’s beginnings years before Jane’s arrival.

Bringing characters back to life upon the page is popular with readers, hence the continuing – perhaps monotonous – practice of writers sticking with particular detectives and families. Such re-imagining is rarely achieved to any high level; main reasons include the reconstruction of a character at conflict with our own memory of the first reading, as well as the reconstruction occurring not by the hands of the original author, but rather by a later writer seemingly bereft of their own ideas. Wide Sargasso Sea could be targeted for both of these reasons, being written a century after the original and with the character of Bertha transformed into the sensual, emotional and human Antoinette.

Rhys succeeds in taking the reader through an action packed story of 125 pages, taking in themes of love and marriage and wider issues of slavery and race. Set in the West Indies in the post-emancipation of slavery in the 1830s, the novel charts the innocent beginnings of Bertha in her original incarnation as Antoinette. Her family are outcasts, of the old slave owning class that are hated by the people of the island. Never finding a place in society, she believes she finds acceptance with a man who remains unnamed throughout the novel, but who is clearly Mr Rochester from Jane Eyre. The young Rochester is suspicious of the island and its ways, ending the novel as Antoinette’s jailer, removing her from the place of her birth, removing her name and her nature.

The West Indies are brought to full colour, as is to be expected by the native Jean Rhys. The landscape becomes overbearing for both our and Rochester’s eyes: ‘Everything is too much…Too much blue, too much purple, too much green. The flowers too red, the mountains too high, the hills too near’ (p.39). In many ways, it is a more alive and exciting novel than Bronte’s Jane Eyre, though its mysteriousness also acts as a barrier to truly embracing these characters.

The book ends back in more familiar climes in England, where the now branded Bertha takes a flame to Rochester’s home. ‘I was outside holding my candle. Now at last I know why I was brought here and what I have to do,’ come the lines from the concluding paragraph. What comes next is the engulfing fire, of Bertha’s death and Antoinette’s final liberation.

Despite the lack of great inter-textual fiction – and Wide Sargasso Sea, despite its fans, is not “great” – the idea itself will long continue to hold sway. For instance, what became of a middle aged Holden Caulfield at the end of The Catcher in the Rye, of the early years of Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights, and even perhaps of the next instalment of Pooter’s The Diary of a Nobody.